• TheSean BarkesClinic

I feel good!

I have never believed the way I feel is a matter of chance. The life we experience is not a chain of chance occurrences.

I hear a crowd of people disagreeing with me, or at the very least starting to feel uncomfortable. If you are one of these, right now, is it possible that you’re feeling that way because of the responsibility I bestow upon you for your own life experience? Is it just too uncomfortable to admit that the discomfort and pain you have experienced in your life is of your own making?

Sure, external things might be seen to happen by chance, but I’ve seen that my experience of them is of my own making. And, certainly, the choices I make as they happen certainly are. I’ve watched myself descend into the depths of depression because of choices I have made or, worse still, not made. I’ve felt my mood change in an instant because of thinking choices I have made. I’ve told myself, “get a grip, Sean!” and then acted.

This is not to say that it’s an easy process. Indeed, I’ve really struggled on many occasions; had some really dark nights of the soul. However, difficult as it may be, though, it is simple!

My own formula is straight forward: do things that make me feel good about myself. This may involve making choices and taking actions that require great courage. However, these choices must be made and when they are, I feel good about myself.

The tools I use for refining my character and building my confidence are mostly modes of physical culture: martial art, running, golf, and squash. I augment these with meditative practices, although all of these activities involve an aspect of meditation. Even my work I treat as a path of self-discovery rather than just a method of making a living. In all these activities, I need to ensure that I continually reinvent my approach so I remain fresh. On numerous occasions I have let this slip only to pay for it in how I feel about myself.

Try doing something new! You can start with with simple things. Let me give an example. This year in June, I started running competitively again. I hadn’t done so for twenty years. I have pushed myself through mental barriers repeatedly since I started again. Each time I do that, I feel better about myself. With each victory over self, and note that the real competition for me is against myself, my confidence grows. Of course, physically I’m in fantastic nick. Mind and body being one, this is bound to make me feel better emotionally. Each time I set myself a challenge and achieve it, I feel better about myself and my confidence grows.

So, my invitation to you is to choose something, or several things, that challenge you personally and refine your character through their practice. Make sure you set challenging but achievable goals. I have no doubt you will feel fantastic!

Of course, if you’ve never experienced this you won’t be able to relate to it. You’ll will just have to take my word for it. Why not make the decision to change and invest in the effort based purely on faith. Hopefully, what I have said makes enough sense and instils enough faith in you to move you to act. I really hope my experience will help a few other people that read this to follow a path that makes life feel better.

Let me leave you with a couple of examples that may further illustrate my point. Both are stories of men who have lost a leg. If I feel down, I think of these men. I have no room to moan! What will you do today to live life magnificently? Please come back and tell me what you have achieved.

Chris Moon

Manuel De Los Santos

Written by Sean

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